Friday 6 April 2012

Weird, Wacky & Worldwide News: The News (mashed up by Cassetteboy)

Weird, Wacky & Worldwide News: The News (mashed up by Cassetteboy): There isn't anyone else I know on YouTube that can rewind, split a clip, digest the news and spit it out and produce short videos which wil...

Thursday 5 April 2012

Weird, Wacky & Worldwide News: Morrocan Law Allows Rape!

Weird, Wacky & Worldwide News: Morrocan Law Allows Rape!: The North African country of Morroco is under increasing pressure to change part of it's judicial system from protesters, after a young g...

Wednesday 4 April 2012

No Win No Fee No Post!

If it isn't pot holes everywhere its seems that pavements are also being left to "rack & ruin"  by councils.
No win no fee!  The dangerous paving slab which caused
serious injuries to a postman.  Bad slab!
In fact it is that bad on one residential estate in Penkridge, Staffordshire, that the Royal Mail will not deliver mail there, because a postman suffered a "serious accident" tripping over uneven paving slabs!
Postal deliveries to the housing estate, have been suspended for around a month now, causing local residents to travel a 14 mile round trip to the nearest depot, to collect parcels and letters.
Even Royal Mail workers think the ban is stupid, but cannot reinstate deliveries until the uneven and broken pavements are repaired.

It's a war zone down there!
Becky with her last letter from Royal Mail
Becky Prince, one of the estate residents says: "It's ridiculous for Royal Mail to say that it is dangerous to deliver to our houses, I have managed to walk down these pavements, with 3 kids and a buggy without injuring myself, as long as you've got eyes you should be fine!"

So what about anyone with sight impairments or the blind then Becky?  Didn't you think of those people?

Do Royal Mail have the X Factor!
Royal Mail spokeswoman Val Bodden said that they had written to all of the affected customers, apologizing and informing them of the ban and added, that they will not compromise the safety of their employee's.

Another resident on the estate, Debbie Butler says: "Its crazy, it's health and safety gone stark raving bonkers!"

Staffordshire County Council, who technically should be responsible for pavement repairs, say that the pavements on the estate are NOT their responsibility, and maintenance and repairs should be initiated by the residents, and the house building company "Wimpey"

The letters sent from Royal Mail to advise the residents of the suspension to postal deliveries, were ironically hand delivered by a postman!

Is it health and safety gone mad?  Surely Royal Mail have a duty to their customers and employee's, but suspending deliveries?
Couldn't Royal Mail make their postmen aware of the "risk" and ask them to use caution on the affected pavement?  Surely they have risk assessments!
And on the other hand, why are Staffordshire County Council not prepared to lend an helping hand in putting the paving slabs right?
All sounds like someone is "passing the buck" here and no body is prepared to sort this out.
Maybe Royal Mail could "air drop" the mail in! And maybe the government could privatise our pavements as well, and toll charges could be passed down to pedestrians!

The world's gone mad!

Here's some great pic's we found


    

Funny how slippery snow doesn't stop the mail from being delivered!
  










Tuesday 3 April 2012

Fart your way to Hollywood!

What an interesting title..........I know a few people, who consider the lengths and permutations of sounds they can create with their flatulence, quite a skill.  Mr Mills I presume!
Well if you are one of those such wind breakers, that consider yourself a truly magnificent trumpeter (not the brass type either) then why don't you head on over to http://breakingwindfilm.com/
Give way to the wind!
They are looking for the best of blow offs, trumps or for the upper class "bottom burps".....specifically from us, here in Britain!
Yes you heard correctly, The De Wolfe sound effects library are looking for someone who can send them a recording of their best "fart!"  You can even submit your best attempt at one without to much ermmmm "effort" as well, because they will accept anything that even remotely sounds like a trump!  Simulated sounds created with your armpits for example, or the palms of your hand will all be given special recognition by judges!
Your creation could become famous!
Once judging has been finalised, the winner will have their "thunder clap" added to the library's expansive collection of sound effects, and you could eventually find your "creation" in Hollywood movies, pop songs, in fact anything which could call for your unique sound effect for years to come!
The contest to find the best of bum burps, is open to anyone over the age of 15, and the organisers stress that they are not responsible for any damage to clothing, during the recording process!  I dread to think what they exactly mean by this!
Silent but deadly examples, will not be accepted!

The competition celebrates the DVD release of a parody film called "Breaking Wind" which makes a mockery of the teen vamp movie: "The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn" which incidentally, part 2 will be out on 16th November 2012.

All entries can be submitted to http://breakingwindfilm.com/ and clicking on "BECOME A FART OF MOVIE HISTORY"..........entries can be submitted by either: uploading your entry to YouTube and posting on Breaking Winds UK Facebook page or emailing your entry directly to competition@breakingwindfilm.com

Gives the game "Top Trumps" a whole new meaning!

We can think of a few parody movies we would like to make here at WWWN!

How about:

FartWars: Revenge of the Sniff

Wind in the Willows!

Meet the Farters

Fartatouille.

We would love to hear your idea's for "bottom burped" movies, so send them to us here, at Weird, Wacky & Worldwide News Contact Page and submit your movie parody title!

And to finish this "lovely" story off, we had to put in some great "farty" jokes!  Hope you like them.

Teacher asks little Johnny to use the word "definitely" in a sentence.
Little Johnny replies "Teacher, do farts have lumps in them?"
The teacher says "Of course not Johnny"
To which Johnny replies "Then I have definitely sh*t my pants then!"



Doctor, "What seems to be the problem?"
Patient, "Doc, I've got the farts. I mean I fart all the time,"
The Doctor nods, "Hmm."
Patient, "My farts do not stink and you can't hear them. It's just that I fart all the time. Look, we've been talking here for about 10 minutes and I've farted five times. You didn't hear them and you don't smell them, do you?"
"Hmm," says the Doctor,
He picks up his pad and writes out a prescription.
The patient is thrilled "Great doc. This prescription, will it really clear up my farts?"
"No," sighs the Doctor, "The prescription is to clear your sinuses. Next week I want you back here for a hearing test."

A man goes to visit his doctor,
"Doc, I've got a rather embarassing problem, my farts just don't sound right,"
"Well how do they sound?" enquires the doctor.
"They make a HONDA sound"
The doctor looks puzzled, "Hmm, is there anything else I should know?"
"Well I also have a terrible boil on my bum," replies the man
The doctor looks pleased, "Thats it then. We'll lance that boil and you'll see a difference immediately,"
"Why's that then, Doc?" asks the man
"It's well known," laughs the Doctor, "Abscess makes the fart go Honda."


You've got to love our jokes!!!
We didn't think farty pictures or videos were appropriate by the way!!!









Sunday 1 April 2012

Are Websites Dead?

According to a Marketing Student I know, she says Websites are dead!

What do you think?

Email us here at Weird, Wacky & Worldwide News and let us know what you think about websites!

Are they annoying, are they dying out, is the WWW (world wide web) just a waste of time?

Is "Instagram" taking the world over and killing off the good old favourites like Facebook and Twitter?

This marketing student claims that websites are dead, and are pointless in a world that seems to be governed by the young and everything THEY do?  What do you think?
Are the young the future of our technical, digital era?  Are they the one's that govern how we spend our time on a computer?  Are they the ones with the spending power to make or break a business?


Is she right, is she wrong?

YOU DECIDE!

Send us your notions here at WWWN and keep posted!


Quick Scopes from Enigma Gee

This week our LUCKY SIGN is Sagittarius...........but our Astrologer, Enigma Gee hopes everyone has a fantastic week ahead, and wins some "dosh" with his lucky number selections, for each and every sign.
Enigma Gee says: "I wish the best of luck to everyone, everyday........but life as a habit of making things hard for us sometimes, and that's why we all need guidance sometimes"


Our Astrologer studies the celestial patterns and tables every day and provides a "Quick Scope" for simplicity to aid people through their everyday lives, and predicts a set of numbers which may bring luck to each and every star sign that he tabulates for.
In addition Enigma Gee says: "The numbers I provide, aren't just for the lottery, but I would like to think that one day, given your lucky numbers, you will win a huge, life changing amount of cash, that would make you happy, but these numbers can also be used to decide whether you choose to live at a particular address, whether you choose to put a bet on a particular horse or dog at a race event, or even a significant date, given the numbers I predict!"
Enigma Gee truly is "enigmatic" in every respect, and that's why he provides us, here at Weird, Wacky & Worldwide News with his fantastic service............come and check out your Quick Scope now..........as Enigma Gee says "you have nothing to lose!"


All the best from WWWN
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